Break. School’s out. I’m dazed and glassy-eyed. I made it. Made it out of my misery.
I survived. And I did not just make it. I was first to break the ribbon and touch the finish line. I can’t believe I actually topped the piano exams. My teacher was never as proud.
Am I not dreaming? Touch me to tell me if I’m real…Or if I’m just soul and all as my body has opted to rest in the grave.
Touch me, or dare take me in your arms. If I feel your warmth, I’d realize that I’m not just dreams But blood, tears, and shivers of long-sought-for bliss. :oops:
I really haven’t admitted to myself my being a hopeless romantic. But I must tell you that this is the greatest love story of all time ever told. It’s about a soldier who went to war leaving behind his ladylove. He assured her that he would be back the seventh dawn after the war…but didn’t make it. Ugh! And here was his song just before he left. It still leaves tears in my eyes.
[i]I remember when I feel lonely The way you kissed me in the rain And darling I remember your golden laughter Whenever spring breaks through again
I’ll be near you when nights are misty Or when the dawn stars come shining through And I’ll find you, I’ll be just a dream behind you For my love will lead me to the seventh dawn and you[/i]
I know that this was the age of slim-waist balloon dresses, closed-toe high heels, and puffed sleeves. But then… *breaks into a sob* :cry:
Finally with sweet surrender, allowing the stark darkness to Devour you whole.
You’re lost in the stillness of the taciturn ebony air …cruel, kind. You perish softly for all you all worth. --Till you don’t regret it: you weren’t worth anything at all.
But why wish that life were written with a pencil Wherein you can erase mistakes?
Why wish you had not cried? You know you don’t have to do so. For you don’t force tears. They gush like the river when the fountain of pain Is full to the brim. Why the fountain of pain: the curse of human nature. We’re doomed to it all. So don’t try running away. You can’t escape fate. Fate is quicker than feet. It will get you… Get you…get you…
Full of emptiness. Empty of fullness. I’m all blood, tears, and dreams.
You're a Winter. You very much enjoy your time alone but do like other people's company sometimes. You just need your space. You have a few priviledged friends who saw past your colder exterior to find the true you. You can have pretty bad mood swings (though you hate to admit it) so you could be soft one second then storming around the next! But over all, you're a very pleasant person once people take the time to get to know you. You're a good friend for in-depth talks. You're very talanted when it comes to creative things.
You represent... hope. You're quite a daydreamer and can be a hopeless romantic. You enjoy being creative and don't mind being alone at times. You have goals, and know what you want in life... even if they are a little far fetched.
You are a Siren. More adventurous than all with a voice like no other you sit on warm rocks and sing to the moon and sea. Yet sometimes shipwrecks find you and raving men want you. You are a bottle of talent and power. What the unknown is you seek to find, and a lover. You have the moon and stars as friends. There are a very few of you, what a rare find.
Okay, so I'm savoring this tiny minute of my life to reflect. So far, I've been going to the university for two weeks, having so far 6 minor accidents,a considerable number of serious ones, two flunked quizzes, a thousand breakdowns, a 1 per minute goof-up, and two pretty sore feet (oh! as if I have more than two feet. I could just wish). I guess I'm joining the national piano competitions to save my confounded ego. I want to... I want to... Still I'm not so sure. I'm too tired to think. Too tired in the context of sheer hopelessness.
The future...doesn't seem so bright ahead. Viewing it from my vantage, I guess it is the darkest and most ambigous of the silhouettes that ever trod my life.
How strange that I find this misery strange. Was I ever really happy? [i]Certainly I was. [/i] But not enough for me to really remember. Misery loves company. And in the darkest of its days, it found me. :x
Have you experienced waking up one day and everything seems wrong?
:shock: You'd wish it were a big joke. You'd wish you could take everything back ang blurt, "Just kidding!" But as things in the world go round, life, is never as easy.
There are times when no matter how you try your dreams don't come to be; further exertion of effort seems futile, and you're losing that thing called faith (if ever there really is a use for it). Like, I used to be strong, and I used to keep faith. I used to...used to...used to...but only used to. [i]Not anymore [/i]is what hurts.
[i]Forget it[/i].
[i]Yes. Forget it, I will[/i].
It's will-o-the-wisp. Not all hope is lost anyway. When you can't find your happily ever after, there's always another option for an ending.
:oops: :roll: :oops: Alone, as always, on a day no better than before. Tears well up in my eyes, but by some uncanny reason, they don't fall. Someone...hurt me. Or is it only the way I feel? For the first time in my summer, I was able to sneak out. They left, and I was more alone than I used to be. So thoughts kept coming into my head, way rigorous than the blood streaming in my veins. I had no money, no umbrella and rain was pouring down. The hell! Even the rain won't care. I went out not knowing where I was going. No one knew. Not even my feet, and for the first time, I guess not even my fate. I braved to walk in the rain. It was only me under the immense sky and on the rough road. [i]Dance like no one's watching[/i], I thought. Then when it dawned to me, I laughed. Actually no one's watching. No one saw me, as hardly anyone ever tried to really see through me beyond this facade so woebegone. There I was frisking under the afternoon rain, picking up fallen yellow bells as I passed by. [i]These will look good on my hair[/i], I said pensively. And truly, I had enough daring to wear them. However, getting home, they ended up on my bed. Yes, yellow bells on my bed.
:wink: I wanted life to be at least a bed of yellow bells if it couldn't be a bed of roses.
So this was a dream. And a dream still. It was all phantom softness that evening. When...
Ako ay iyong hinagkan sa bubungan na noo'y siyang lupa. Sino makapagsasabing pagkakasala Ang gayong pagsinta? At Ako'y iyong inangkin sa karagatan ng damdamin. Ang daigdig ay atin... At ako ay sa iyo.
I feel something. Some ache. Some pang. And it wouldn't go. :cry: I wish I knew how to make myself feel better. Or perhaps how to be a better person instead. But I don't know how to or even where to start. I'm breaking my heart. Like a pinch nerve that won't go, plagues my being. Faces seething. Figures sway. Then all away...
This may seem ludicrous, but I heard someone say, "I love my life too much that I'd die for it." I'd say, "I love death too much that I live for it."
Wahaha! So I've been the undisputed poker champion for three weeks now. 8) Amazing! Mr. Larry never wins...And I'm sorry for him because he never will! :twisted: Ha ha ha! I told him that he'd be sorry to teach me. He didn't believe that gambling was in my blood. :D Imagine, 4's, fullhouses, and royal flushes consecutively. How lucky can I get? When I win the lottery, Mr. Larry and I will be playing in Las Vegas (well, don't ridicule the idea, it was his). What ambition! Who knows, I might become a Las Vegas showgirl instead. Hey! Just in time for my tap dancing class. I'll be a billion-dollar baby. Yeah why not? If I can romp like this every night, that's far from impossible. Oh well!
:roll: :roll: REALLY, I'd kiss the first frog that dedicates this this poem to me.
somewhere i have never travelled, gladly beyond any experience,your eyes have their silence: in your most frail gesture are things which enclose me, or which i cannot touch because they are too near
your slightest look will easily unclose me though i have closed myself as fingers, you open always petal by petal myself as Spring opens (touching skilfully,mysteriously)he r first rose
or if your wish be to close me, i and my life will shut very beautifully ,suddenly, as when the heart of this flower imagines the snow carefully everywhere descending;
nothing which we are to perceive in this world equals the power of your intense fragility:whose texture compels me with the color of its countries, rendering death and forever with each breathing
(i do not know what it is about you that closes and opens;only something in me understands the voice of your eyes is deeper than all roses) nobody,not even the rain,has such small hands :o :o
What are you waiting for? I'm counting. Ready, set...go! Oops. Time's up.
:twisted: :twisted: :twisted: I'm mad, mad, mad. Mad on a two-way street. Angry-Mad and Loony-Mad. I'm having allergy attacks. Man. What to do? What to do? Nothing. Can't bribe them off. :oops:
PoiGnaNt PoiNtiLLisM by the PiXiE Tears are the Sweat of the Heart -jaye
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